Anxious to Secure
Everything you need to heal, break anxious
habits and shift into your best, Secure Self.
Does this sound familiar?
"I'm too much."
"They are going to leave me."
“If they really loved me, they would _____.”
"They're losing interest."
"Why am I so needy and they
aren't? What's wrong with me?"
"Why are they pulling away?
Did I do something wrong?"
"Why would they choose me
when they could have him/her?"
"Fine, whatever, I
don’t need them!”
IF YOU CAN RELATE, YOU ARE NOT ALONE
You might be struggling with anxious
attachment tendencies.
People with an anxious attachment style typically grew up with inconsistent parents who were sometimes attuned and supportive and sometimes unavailable.
This uncertainty was confusing for the child to process, leading them to wonder:
“Are you going to be there for me….or no?”
“Did I do something wrong?”
“What must I do to get them to love me?"
To cope, they developed anxious habits to fulfill their emotional needs. If left unresolved, they carry the habits into their adulthood and repeat similar patterns with their partner, hoping to fill the emotional void.
Getting emotionally attached too quickly: "My folks are going to love him" after one date.
Threatening to break up whenever you disagree: "Fine, let's break up then!"
Lashing out about little things: “You always forget to take the trash out! You don’t care about me!”
'Testing' your partner's love to see if they stay: "Maybe you should be with her instead!"
You might be wondering..
How do anxious tendencies
show up in relationships?
Being very clingy and needy: "Please stay home with me."
Over-the-top levels of jealousy: "You always go out with your friends!"
Blaming/Criticizing: "You never put me first, you don't care!"
Needing constant reassurance of your partner's love for you: "I love you. Do you love me?"
If you're reading this and feeling discouraged and frustrated don't panic: there isn't anything 'wrong' with you!
If you’re here, you’re probably feeling so tired and fed up with how your anxious tendencies impact your relationships, and you’re wondering
How do I fix this?
How do I become secure?
Anxious to Secure
An accessible online course that you can fit around your schedule, containing everything you need to heal, break your anxious tendencies, and finally feel calm, confident and secure in yourself and therefore in your relationship.
Modules are broken down into bite-sized videos, along with straightforward tools that you can implement immediately to get results.
Anxious to Secure is rooted in 2 pillars:
- Gaining awareness of anxious tendencies
and unhealthy patterns - Actively shifting from those old patterns
to new secure behaviors.
The main focus of the course is learning to reparent yourself.
Imagine your ideal parents growing up. What do they look like? How do they treat you?
Healthy, secure, loving parents are:
Compassionate, kind, and supportive- Emotionally available
- Attuned to your needs
They:
- Guide you through life
- Model healthy boundaries
By learning to become this ‘ideal parent’ for yourself, you can get to the root of your anxious tendencies, heal, and develop a loving and secure relationship with yourself.
Then, these secure skills will naturally transfer over to your relationships, without having to try too hard.
The benefits you can experience are
Having fun dating instead of dreading it.
No more churning in your stomach when a first date doesn't text you back immediately.
Enjoying a relationship that lasts and brings you joy
Feeling peaceful, and secure even when your partner has other things going on.
Less arguments or days of living in angry silence with your partner
because you regulate your emotions and communicate non-provocatively
Testimonials
Sarah, this course is just SO IMPACTFUL. This work really has such tangible change not just to those that do the course but also to the people they are in relationship with and will even potentially have intergenerational impact. This course came at the right time and has really helped me to become a better person for all of my loved ones. THANK YOU for the work you do! I now live with far less anxiety and stress in my internal world and it is so freeing!"
Maddison.A.
I loved everything about this course. You are truly a heaven sent angel and your energy and ability to connect with others is gold! I can honestly say that your program changed my life, it really changed how I view myself, others and those in my close circle. All of this new information has also allowed me to share it with others whenever applicable. I am for sure going to revisit these items as I go through life! Thank you so much for this, I will never forget the nuggets of knowledge and compassion I learned."
Jesse.G.
Because of Sarah’s program, I am now better at identifying my feelings, validating myself and meeting my own needs emotionally. I’m becoming more secure within myself. My partner and I both have a guide that helps us communicate in a way we’ve never done before. It created more intimacy because we are not able to be more vulnerable with each other. I’ve learned concepts that will help me forever on my journey throughout life.
Ciara
What will you learn?
By the end of this course you will...
Shift from anxious to secure in yourself, finally trusting in yourself and believing you're loved and accepted for who you are.
No longer rush to 'fix' your partner if they seem 'off' because you no longer take it personally; instead, offer them gentle support (and reassure your inner child that it's not your job to keep them happy!)
Stop pushing away your partner during a disagreement to 'test' their love, and instead communicate how you feel and repair your connection
Having better boundaries in relationships and asserting what kind of love is acceptable to you.
You and your partner stop seeing one another as the enemy, resolve conflict quickly, and enjoy your lives together!
Ready to start?
Break the anxious cycles and step into your confident and secure self so that you can thrive in your dream relationship as a secure partner.
Testimonials
"Sarah was honestly the best thing to happen to me!
She is a true professional and understands the dynamics of relationships and how our childhood attachment styles affect all aspects of our adult relationships.
She is knowledgeable, empathetic, and understands the dynamics of how we talk to ourselves and others. Her thoughtful inquiry during our sessions always gave me insight into how I was feeling, thinking, or behaving. I now understand the unconscious patterns I engage in and have ignored for a very long time.
And the best part (for me!) is the tools to use outside the sessions. They've helped me continue healing, changing my behavior, and transforming my relationship with myself. With each session, I walk away with a better understanding of myself and others. I am forever grateful to Sarah. Choosing her as my life coach has been one of the best decisions of my life."*
Stephanie K., 51
PhD. NYC
"She has guided me through the worst time of my life. I didn’t think it was possible to be happy again."
Sarah has been fantastic to work with. She has guided me through the worst time of my life. I didn’t think it was possible to be happy again. Sarah helped me heal the trauma of my toxic relationship. She taught me how to set boundaries and heal my codependency habits. She showed me this with kindness and grace by allowing me to discover it on my own.
She truly is one of the kindest people I have ever met. She is non-judgmental and really cares about getting you to a place you would never imagine you could be. You can tell that her words are from the heart, just from her face – when I hurt, I can feel that she hurts with me, and when things are amazing, she celebrates with me. I always look forward to our time together and sharing my progress.
I am forever thankful for her. She has blessed me in so many ways. I would highly recommend her. She deeply cares about her clients. I now would call her friend."*
Chris H., 47
Vice President Dallas-Ft. Worth
"Sarah was a precious resource to me during one of the most challenging times in my life."
*"Sarah was a precious resource to me during one of the most challenging times in my life. Not only did I get exactly what I was looking for but I experienced compassion, validation, and patience far beyond what I expected.
I was in a place of pure logic at the time – just tell me how to get better, and I'll do it! But Sarah truly saw me and helped me to finally let my deep emotions out and heal them in such a comfortable and caring space.
Acknowledging my actual experiences and emotions and using the resources and exercises that Sarah provided me allowed me to make huge strides in my healing, self-esteem, and self-worth in just a few months. I am truly grateful to her for her kindness, expertise, and compassion and highly recommend Sarah to anyone dealing with painful emotions or to anyone interested in self-improvement of any kind."
Erin W.,
Real Estate Agent
My Story
I was twelve years old when, yet again, I was hiding in my room, listening to my parents screaming at each other. That night, I made a promise to myself through my tears:
'I will do whatever it takes not to repeat what my parents did!'
But I struggled right from get go in my relationships as a teen. I pushed my partners away, gave them the silent treatment, or blew up at nothing to get a reaction. I would overreact to the slightest change in their demeanor, desperate for them to reach out and give me the assurance I craved.
I thought to myself, "Why do I act this way?"
In hindsight, I was swinging back and forth between an Anxious Attachment style (desperately wanting partners to meet my unmet needs) and an Avoidant Attachment (desiring love but also terrified of it).
But I honored that commitment I made to never accept less than a healthy relationship, and dedicated the next 15 years to my inner healing. I studied psychology and Attachment Theory, did countless trainings, and became a life and relationships coach.
Over time, I practiced what I learned and I healed.
Today, I'm secure and happy in my relationship with my wonderful, loving fiance of seven years! I no longer need endless reassurance from him or feel scared he will leave me. I feel safe and content in our joyful and peaceful relationship and I pinch myself every day that I get to enjoy such fulfilling love and look forward to the future.
If you've been affected by your parents' relationship like I was, and you're about to get married, start a family, or have kids already, and you're determined to heal so you can do things differently, you're in the right place!
I have poured all my learning, experience, and research into Anxious to Secure so that you can have the healthy, beautiful relationship you deserve in a matter of months instead of 15 years!
Are you ready to dive in?
Sarah x
